#confessionsonsafarnamay: Mein uskay baghair mukammal aur mutmaeen hoon.

It was a rainy morning. Tears rolled down my face as I looked out of the window, watching the grey sky pour. The tears this time were not of a broken heart, or lack of decisiveness, or of being let down again. This time, they were tears of contentment, because finally, this morning, I woke up with clarity. I had decided. I wanted a divorce.

It was an arranged marriage. The families were happy. My impression of him was based on meeting him just once before our wedding and he seemed like a decent person. I was very young and willing to mould myself.

Soon after the wedding, red flags began to appear. However, I attributed incidents like not going on a honeymoon or not being allowed to go out alone to the 7 year age gap between us. He never abused me physically, but he never took care of my needs. He gave me space but never made me feel loved. He never asked me for money in so many words, but he casually stole from my wallet. He never became a stone in the path of my career but he never wanted to work either. He never disrespected my parents but laid a bad eye on someone very close to me. I knew that he was in touch with an ex and at times, uncomfortably friendly with other females.

For a long time, I didn't think he is a bad person. But he made mistakes, he made tons of them and I kept forgiving. I wanted to give it my all. I thought I loved him. I didn’t want the label of a divorcee. But I wasn’t able to look towards him for anything. It took me a long time to be able to differentiate between ‘mistakes’ and ‘habits’. A person can apologize for mistakes and not repeat them. But a person cannot do much to re-weave the fabric of his nature.

As time passed, I started losing respect for and trust in him. He once left me at my parents’ house, saying that he will be travelling for business, only for me to discover later that he never left the city. He would brag about a business that didn’t exist. It was awkward for me that he was financially dependent on his father. On the other hand, I supported not just myself but also spent on our vacations and other requirements. As I contemplated whether I should take this relationship further, we got our immigration. Since we had been waiting for that to materialize for a long time, I decided to give ‘us’ another chance, based on his commitment of seeking professional therapy. He went back on his words later though, and I wasn’t even surprised this time.

The weak walls of love within which I lived began to shatter. I wasn’t looking for a ‘perfect fairytale marriage’ but I was definitely in search of my happy place. This wasn’t it. His jokes stopped making me laugh. Intimacy became an emotionless chore. His face became a canvas of lies. As the cycle of mistakes and forgiveness repeated itself, I felt physically and emotionally drained. I would always say to myself “chalo, kam se kam wo mujhay maarta to nahin”. Par waqt guzarnay ke saath mujhay ehsaas hoa mein itni gai guzri to nahin ke agar uski khaamiyon ki fehrsat mein haath uthana shaamil nahin, to mein uski tamaam kotaahiyon se samjhota karoon.

As I saw my marriage cripple, I felt I lost a part of me. But I thank the Almighty that I didn’t lose my complete self on this journey. I realized that there are other things that make me happy, other relationships that add value to my life. I was happy at work, when I travelled, when I spent time with my loved ones, when I connected with God. I realized that we are not made for each other. He was incorrigible and I didn’t want to be miserable anymore. His definition of right and wrong was different from mine and I was done trying to accept that.

I have no regrets that I decided to bid farewell to a relationship that once meant so much to me. I am happy that Allah made me realize that divorce is detestable in His eyes, yet it is allowed for the right reasons. I am happy that my decision to walk out of my marriage wasn’t hasty like the decision to walk into the marriage. I took 6 long years to decide. I am thankful to Allah for all the hardships He gave me for each one of them contributed to my strength.

To all the beautiful souls out there who are struggling in their relationships, know that you and your mental peace are important. Give chances, for everyone makes mistakes. Laikin ghalti aur khaslat mein tameez karna bhi seekho. Divorce is not a small deal, but do remember that it is as big a deal as YOU make it. Don’t be afraid of decision making and change. Every big decision (whether it’s the decision of walking out of a relationship or staying after a rough patch) is a new beginning and trust me, new beginnings are always great!

By Anonymous.

This story has been illustrated by Art By Benazir. You can check out more of her work here.

Realisation #6: The best gift you can give to a child is a happy mum.

When you’re a working mum, the possibility that mom guilt gets the best of you every now and then is high. We’re mums. We’re women. That’s just how our DNA is built. Spending the entire day out for work tends to make us feel like we haven’t been there enough for our children. And dare we step out for an emotional retreat post work, that bears the final blow to our mommy hearts.

I went back to work only 2.5 months after Minha was born. I was craving to be back in that stimulating environment. I used to be up at nights with her, like any other mom with an infant, but making it for my 7:30 am class was my way of holding on to my individuality. Doing what I loved, which was teaching, rejuvenated me. I worked till the last month of both my pregnancies because my work always makes me happy. Albeit now, it’s my blog and not teaching.

Would Minha be more looked after had I not gone back to work after her birth? Would I have been a better mum to Bano had I not been thinking what to write about next on my blog? Would I have been able to make my home a happier place had there been no career to pursue for me? No, no and no.

Here’s what I keep in mind to chuck that ‘mom guilt’ out of my system every time it knocks on my door.

•   Quality > quantity. Now that I am a stay at home mum, I don’t feel I am able to achieve anything extra with my kids. When your kids are in your face 24/7, every moment spent is not an epitome of love and learning. If you spend your day at the office, come back and cover up for what you have missed. Hug, cuddle, kiss, have your meal together, talk about the day and go over the homework, and have best of both worlds.

• When you step out to work, there is a LOT you’re teaching your kids. You teach them how money doesn’t grow on trees and you have to work hard to earn it. When you stay back to prepare for a Monday presentation as the rest of the family goes out for lunch on Sunday, you teach your children good work ethics. You break away from gender roles and teach your kids that mama and baba both contribute towards running the house. You also teach that a house doesn’t need a male head to be run; it works even better when 2 partners are running it together.

• Your kids look up to you when they see you looking fresh, determined and ready to take on the world. Minha has always valued my teaching, my writing and now my blogging. She thinks I am “famous and very successful” and she goes around her school saying that, LoL.

• You teach your children to be more independent when they spend a few hours away from you. They learn to cope with small issues on their own, which really is a life skill you’re equipping them with. When mama is around less, there’s less spoon-feeding and entitlement.

• It’s all about what your kids are used to. Minha has grown up seeing me on my laptop. So, when I have it open, she knows mama is working and must not be disturbed. As opposed to this, my mum never went out to work and we were used to having her around us all the time. To date, if she steps out even for a small errand or to see a friend, everyone including us, our dad, the dogs and the house help feel paralyzed.

• “Kaam pe jao gi to bacchay tum se waisey pyaar nahin karein gay” Is the biggest piece of BS ever. Your kids are YOUR kids, and you going to work cannot turn them into someone else’s. They will always love you the same. Your relationship with your kids is what you believe and make it to be. So, if those aunties try to get you all emotional by saying this, tell them “you know nothing, Aunty Snow”.

• Being financially independent is always a plus. Not just for your self esteem but also for your relationship and for your home. Matlab, baat saaf si hai. Zamana hai mehngaai ka. And if you’re earning for yourself, you can fulfil your choti choti khwashishein AND chip in for the bigger expenses of your home. Of course, how and where you decide to spend your money depends on your home requirements, but it gives you a LOT of azaadi and mental peace.

• You need to know that you’re not the ONLY parent. Your husband is as much responsible for your children as you are. Your partner needs to understand that you cannot miss a meeting just like he can’t. So, on days you’re running late, he takes the child to the birthday party and vice versa.

In conclusion, the fact of life is that a happy mum is a happy home. And what makes a mum happy is something that SHE decides, whether that is staying home or going out to work. When you go out every day in the pursuit of your dreams and return home feeling accomplished, you’re able to cater to your family with a smile. Remember that being a working parent is a CHOICE that YOU make. Sometimes, you will miss a playdate. Sometimes, you will miss a meeting. You have to strive to strike the right balance. So, given that you’re leaving your kids in safe hands while you’re at work, a grandparent, a reliable nanny, a day care, after school care, take a deep breath, sit back, and know that your kids will, Inshallah, do just fine. And, so will you.

#confessionsonsafarnamay: Mein talaaq yaafta hoon, kamzor nahin.

When I returned from England with a medical post graduate degree to marry my suitor, my father could never imagine the kind of life I was about to begin. The man who seemed to be the perfect match for me, who seemed to respect not just me but my idea of pursuing a career as a doctor after marriage, my choice of clothes and my choice of friends, turned out to be the complete opposite.

Domestic violence began soon after my marriage. I was hit and beaten up within the confines of my bedroom. Abuses were hurled at me as my in laws witnessed the scene. My character was questioned. I was not free to drive, to work, or even freely meet my own brother. I was woken up at 5 am in the morning to manage all the house chores, from washing the toilets to cooking the meals, single-handedly. The house help was kicked out because my in laws now had me as an unpaid servant.The man who vowed to protect me could not control his hands or his tongue even after I started expecting his child. Tired and exhausted, when I wasn’t able to fulfill his physical needs at night, he would lose his temper.

Life did not stop testing me even after my delivery. My precious little daughter was born with a condition called Patent Ductus Arteriosus. The doctor asked me to nurture her with utmost care as any form of infection could lead to heart complications and prove fatal for her. With the house chores already taking a toll on me, I now had the added responsibility of taking care of a new born who had a special condition. There were times when I wanted to give up, but I gathered every ounce of strength from my being to keep my marriage intact for for my girl. I wanted her to have a complete life with both her mother and her father to look after and protect her.

In all this time, the physical and emotional abuse continued. I wanted to keep this from my parents, who, I felt, will not be able to deal with the trauma that their daughter is not happy in her marriage. One day, as my husband lost his temper, he slapped me in front of our daughter, who was just two. She began to cry in horror. That was my tipping point. I decided I cannot continue living with a man who not just disrespects me, but also does not care about what kind of a environment he is giving his daughter to grow up in. 

I left for my parents house and told them everything. They wished I had taken them into confidence before. They said they can deal with my home breaking, but they cannot bear my self respect being shredded into pieces, day after day, in front of their grandchild. With their support, I filed for divorce.

From that day on, I decided to be strong for my daughter. She started school and I began a job as well as private practice. I have never asked for a penny from my ex-husband, who turned out to be a bigger jerk than I thought he was. Perhaps, zaalim is the right word for him. He broke all ties with his own flesh and blood by sending me a legal document, stating that she has no claim to his property. With the passage of time I have been able to heal my heart but I have not been able to forgive him. Today, my life revolves around my beautiful daughter, who, by the grace of God, is free from PDA. I am financially independent and can afford to support myself and her. Together, we take vacations, watch movies, order in pizzas and enjoy life to the fullest. When I smile, I do it with honesty, I do it with all my heart, because I have nothing holding me back from being happy.

Yes, a good partner can make life heaven for you. But a partner that physically and emotionally abuses you makes life a living hell. Aisay mard ke saharay se acha hai aurat apna sahara khud banay. My heart goes out to my parents who understood my pain and supported me at every step of the way. Had they been stuck in ‘logon ko kya jawaab dein gay’, I’d still be hiding my bruises from the world. And my daughter……I don’t even want to begin thinking how a disturbed childhood would have affected her personality and mental development. I am happy I realized that when a woman decides to be strong, she can be an iron-lady.

By Anonymous.

This story has been illustrated by Remal Thoughts. You can check out more of her work here. 

#confessionsonsafarnamay: The girl with pimples

For over a decade, I was the girl with pimples. Not 1, not 2, but many. When I used to speak about what I felt about my “cosmetic” problem, people retorted “come on, you talk like you have a disease. Be thankful it’s just acne”. But that ‘just’ is easy jargon when you have clear, glowing skin and not a dented, scarred one.

The problem that started in 10^th grade and considered ‘normal’ by my friends and family made my life not-so-normal.  People would casually remark “yeh tumharay moo pay kya hoa”? with hints of disgust on their faces. I wish I could smile and say “I don’t care” like that girl in the Indian face wash ad. I wish I was clean and clear, but I was the opposite. I responded by using loads of makeup to hide the mess on my face, which worsened my condition. On my sister’s nikkah, when I wanted to look my best, my face was a pool of big red pimples. I remember looking at my reflection in the mirror and crying. I felt so ugly. When people stared at my face, I felt ashamed and tried to hide it behind my hair. Slowly, the beauty standards of the society crushed me and with every effort that I made to face the world, my self esteem was kicked, shoved and broken. No one understood how painful that struggle was for me, or how I became a recluse and an introvert. I couldn’t concentrate on my studies, I lost track of everything I was supposed to be and do.

It took me a while to convince my parents to take me to a dermatologist. I was bent upon getting rid of the ‘curse’ on my face, willing to take strong medication. But, when treatment began, I ended up with partial blindness for a week. That was one hell of a jolt and I realized that I am so obsessed with outward beauty that I am jeopardizing my mental peace as well as my health. From that point, I resorted to ‘limu totkas’ and became my own acne expert. With time, the marks on my skin dwindled. I realized I was much more than just a girl with pimples. When you’re positive and confident, it shows on your face and now I don’t allow those occasional zits impact the beauty that I carry in my heart. I am beautiful, with or without pimples. In this battle with myself, I am a winner.”

Illustration: Wasabi Illustrations. Check out more of their work here.

#Confessionswithsafarnamay: I am the ‘haw haye’ Pakistani girl

Although I feel like I am a regular woman who dreams, aspires and loves, I am the typical Pakistani sample who raises the haws and hayes of aunties in social gatherings.

When I graduated at the age of 22, I was ‘ripe’ for marriage. However, I refused to be the girl who marries just because she’s at a marriageable age according to desi standards. I wanted to have a career instead and to wait to come across the right person. When I was a child and I’d visit my father’s office, I used to love sitting in his chair and pretend being the CEO of a company, answering calls and signing important documents. I wanted to pursue my dream to stand on my own feet and earn myself a living. As I built myself a career, my parents faced a lot of social pressure. “Shaadi kab karo gi? Buddhi ho gai to miyaan nahin milay ga”. I got all of that, but I didn’t cave in.

8 years later, I found the one I wanted to marry. We were in love, but he was 5 years younger than I was. While I had a successful career, he was just beginning. He was comfortable in his own skin and I loved that about him. The aunty brigade, however, wasn’t happy. People around me felt that this marriage cannot work because I am older and happen to earn more. According to the Pakistani mentality, a financially independent woman isn’t capable of making a home.

We have been married for 5 years now and we are happy. We have been through our share of troubles but we want to be together. I travel a lot for work, I still earn more than he does, but that doesn’t come in the way of my respect or my love for him. Every day when I come back, I give all my time to my home and to my husband. I neaten up our space, I fix his cupboard for him, I manage my groceries and I cook the things he likes. I spend time with my in-laws. For the moment, we have decided to not have children. And of course, if you refuse to be a baby machine and choose your career, you’re not the right bahu.

Most of the time I don’t pay heed to what people say. But sometimes it is nice to hear your susraal say that they are proud of your achievements. Instead, my career is something they have to ‘bear’. Sometimes, it hurts when I find them to be apologetic in front of aunties that their daughter in law is a career woman. My husband is proud of me but unfortunately the world is still uncomfortable. I wish Pakistani women weren’t judged for the paths they chose. I wish the society was proud of me and my choices. I wish more men were comfortable with this arrangement. Yet, in the face of angst and disapproval, I march forward to become who I want to be.

By Anonymous. 

This story has been illustrated by Fatima Baig. You can follow her here.

5 NO-COOK, NO-BAKE Tea Time Recipes

Mehfil loot lein, budget mein

There are lots topics discussed on my blog which are close to my heart and one of them is keeping it easy and stress free for yourself when you’ve got people coming over. The idea is not to be NOT mehmaannawaz. I idea is to keep it simple, practical yet making an impact. Kaun keh raha hai bad-maza cheezein khilaao, ya sookhi chai ke sath hosting karo. Bass barhi si trolley ko choti si tray se replace karo aur mehfil loot lo!

Move over haleem and shaami kababs (unless you’re banay banaye DAWN walay), easier and yummier condiments are the new cool.

Three-tiered Pineapple sticks

My mum's been using these since my bachpan to serve as appetizers at dinner parties but I think if you have them chilled, they would make a great item for tea time or iftar parties too. A little sweet, a little sour and so fulfilling, thanks to the cottage cheese.

Ingredients:

1 block of cottage or feta cheese (depends on what you prefer)

A few olives (green or black, both work)

A small tin of pineapple slices

Some chili flakes and oregano

What to do:

Cut the cheese and the fruit into small cubes and then use toothpicks/finger food sticks (fancy ones if you have them, like the ones I have used) to assemble this delight - cheese on the bottom, then pineapple and then an olive on the top.

Garnish your dish with some chili flakes and oregano before serving. 

Cracker Platter

This one’s super impressive, tasty and ideal with a warm cup of chai or coffee. There is so much going on in one platter yet there’s no cooking or baking involved. Bijli na bhi ho, kitchen se aap zinda hi lautein gay!

Ingredients

Crackers of your choice

A can/packing of ready-made hummus

Olives (green and black)

Pickles (handful)

Jalapenos (handful)

Cold cut chicken

Cheese slices

Chili flakes and oregano for garnish

What to do:

Choose a nice flat platter and spread crackers in lines. Cut all the olives, jalapenos, and pickles in small pieces, as shown in the photo. Now alternate the lines, one with hummus and one with cheese slices.

For the hummus crackers, use a teaspoon to top each cracker with a generous dollop. Top with one piece each of jalapeno, green olives and pickles.

For the cheese crackers, cut the cheese and cold chicken slices into 4 parts. Top each cracker with a piece of cheese, cold chicken, then finally finishing off with black olives and jalapenos.

Sprinkle chili flakes and oregano on the dish as garnish and serve.

TIP: Don’t prepare the crackers too much in advance. They tend to get soggy otherwise.

Cream Cheese Dip

Okay, this one’s famous. I made this for Faizaan’s birthday party and had everyone asking me for the recipe. So, I did it again when he invited his colleagues over. Someone actually said “this is the best sauce I have ever tasted”…..only that it’s a dip and not a sauce. I like serving it with cucumbers and carrots but everyone started dipping in their grilled chicken too! So, if I were in Pakistan, I’d order a plate of chicken boti and even serve that alongside!

Ingredients

½ cup yogurt

½ cup Philadelphia cream cheese mousse (I used to buy Puck or Kraft  cream cheese when I was in Pakistan)

4 tablespoons mayonnaise

4 tablespoons cream (optional)

½ teaspoon garlic paste

Chili flakes

Oregano

Salt to taste

What to do:

Mix everything together with a whisk and serve with the veggies.

Yaani. SO EASY.

Cheese platter

If you love cheese, you’re going to love this. Plus, this is mostly assembling, not even cutting.

Ingredients

Variety of cheese (I used 3 types, out of which 2 are easily available in Pakistan, the cheese slices and triangles. If you find just those, it’s good enough. OR you can make a cheese dip and pop that into the mix too!)

Grapes (green and purple)

Variety of crackers

What to do:

Put everything on a cheese board aesthetically and serve. If you don’t have a cheese board, use a chopping board!

Nutella Crunch Cookies

This list would not have been complete without meetha and without chocolate! Here’s the simplest, most divine ‘goodness on a biscuit’ that you can serve without working hard.

Ingredients

Nutella

Cereal (I usually use Kellogg Special K because we always have that at home. You can use Muesli too.)

Simple plain biscuits (I used Marie in Pakistan)

Chopped hazelnuts for garnish (optional)

What to do:

Crush some cereal in your fist (lol) and put it in a bowl. Add a few tablespoons of Nutella and mix. The consistency should be thick. Put dollops of this this mixture on the biscuits, garnish with hazelnuts and serve. Voila!

TIP: If you’re Nutella has succumbed to the temperature and is a little too thick/hard, warm it in the 

microwave for a few seconds before mixing.

FARHAT ISHTIAQ ANSWERS ALL YOUR YKS QUESTIONS

Let this cure your YKS blues this Wednesday

Mahvish Ahmed

Sometimes, “they lived happily ever after” is just not enough. Some plays find an eternal place in your heart and you become severely attached to the characters, especially when one of them is the drool worthy D.Asfandyar casting his charm on the TV screen for one hour every week. Just like he didn’t want the car ride with Zubia to end, we didn’t want Yakeen Ka Safar to end. Wednesdays now feel gloomy and we miss seeing Zubia’s pretty smile, listening to Dr.Haroon’s lame jokes and watching Asfi stealing glances at his lady love. There’s so much more we wanted to see happen in YKS and then there are several questions too that were left unanswered.

So, guess what we did! We went straight to Farhat Ishtiaq, the woman behind it all, and asked her questions to our heart’s content. We also gave her some scenarios which she imaginatively answered. She’s warm, she has magic in her pen and can feel human emotions so very deeply. You want to what our conversation was like? Here goes.

WO: What did Asfandyar actually think when he got the “Love you darling” message from Zubia?

Farhat Ishtiaq: For a moment, he was shocked at Zubia saying this to him right after he had scolded her. But being an intelligent man, he soon realized it was a mistake and the message was not meant for him. By the way, I wrote this scene based on my own experience when I sent the wrong message to someone thinking I am texting my friend (haha)! These situations can be very embarrassing.

WO: Did Asfandyar and Zubia ever discuss THAT message? Did they laugh over it?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Yes! On the wedding night he showed her the message since he had it saved in his phone and teased her about it.

WO: What was the exact moment when Asfandyar started developing feelings for Zubia?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Well, he was developing a soft corner for her since some time, though he was in denial. But the first time he really noticed her was when she asked him to help Khajista. He was able to see Daniyal in her, as he had also taken a stand to help a girl get justice. And, after that rainy night post the hepatitis camp, he falls for her full-fledged.

WO: Did Zubia ever forgive Rehan?

Farhat Ishtiaq: After showing Zubia how weak he was as a brother, she was never really able to forgive him dil se. After all, he had kicked her out of the house in the middle of the night and left her all alone to face the world. However, for duniyadaari, she does keep a relationship with him after her marriage. Aik aurat ka agar maika ho, uskey liye izzat ki baat hoti hai. Dil mein khalish to rahi, but she started speaking to Rehan again.

WO: How did Asfandyar save Zubia when she tried to commit suicide? Did she actually jump into the river?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Actually, I had written the scene a little differently – Asfandyar reached Zubia before she could jump and when he gets to her, she faints in her arms with a nervous breakdown. At that point, Zubia was someone who was not in her senses and did not know what she was doing. That’s how scared and panic stricken she was to see Rehan. However, while shooting the scene, it was dramatized a little for television where it seemed as if she did jump and the audience could not figure out how she was saved.

WO: Where did the wedding take place – from Zubia’s house in Karachi or Islamabad?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Zubia agreed to go back to her home in Karachi for the wedding. If I got the chance to write that scene, entering her house where she grew up, where her mother was killed, where she finally saw Abbi acting like a real father to her and the house from which she was kicked out, would have been a very emotional moment for Zubia. Itnay saalon baad ghar jaa ke usay wo tamaam takleef de waaqiyat yaad aatay.

WO: What happens to Rehan and his relationship with Sheema?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Rehan becomes just like Abbi. This is my observation that men eventually treat their wives the same way they have seen their fathers treat their mothers. Though Sheema  wouldn’t be able o do much when Zubia comes home for her wedding and re-enters Rehan’s life, she would always remain as bitter. People with so much negativity in them can never change. Usay kabhi apni zyadati ka ehsaas na hota.

WO: Abbi left the house for Zubia in his will. Did she ever claim her right over the house and her mother’s jewelry?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Zubia is not at all materialistic and not one to claim her right over her property. But it is possible that Rehan, realizing his mistakes and as his apology, would have handed over the house to his sister eventually.

Also, if Zubia had claimed her right over the house when she was being kicked out, how would she have met the hero of the story?!

WO: What did Asfandyar give Zubia as moon dikhaai?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Perhaps a medical book dealing with liver to remind Zubia of the wrong treatment she gave a liver patient and the scolding she got for that (haha). Of course, this would be just to tease her. After that, he would have given her a piece of jewelry.

WO: What is Dr. Asfandyar’s specialization? How can he handle every surgery?

Farhat Ishtiaq: He is a general surgeon. However, he specializes in the abdomen and hepatitis. That was his main focus since the incidence of this disease is very high in Pakistan’s northern areas.

WO: How did Noori bring the big rifle to a political rally without alerting the security?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Since the play was fiction, we had to take some liberty (haha)! But on a serious note, these things happen in reality. When a person is driven to the point Noori was at, completely broken and hopeless, he does not care of the consequences of his actions. Noori just wanted revenge, even if that cost her life. And that is exactly what she did.

WO: Did Gaiti and Dr.Haroon have more children after their marriage?

Farhat Ishtiaq: You know, that is an area which I could have explored as an entirely new story but I did not have that space while writing my novel. But if I think about it, they would have had a happy marriage and would have had more children. Initially though, it would be tough for Gaiti since learning how to truly love for the second time is difficult for a woman. Aur Gaiti ne Daniyal se shiddat se mohabbat kit thi. So, in the beginning, she would probably think of Daniyal a lot, compare Haroon with him and feel she is not being faithful to Haroon.

WO: Why was the khala telling the entire family history to an unknown Rashid?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Well, she is shown as a seedhi saadi, ghar mein rehnay wali khatoon and Asfandyar being an intelligent man gets her to say more than she should have to a stranger. However, I’d like to add that sometimes when you write a scene, it is not translated onto the TV screen the way you had imagined. We were probably not able to portray that part the way we had perceived it.

WO: Why did Asfi cancel the wedding if he trusted Zubia all along?

Farhat Ishtiaq: He never stopped trusting her. In fact, it was just the manifestation of his disappointment in the fact that Zubia did not trust him enough to come and tell him that it was her who he had saved from Rameez’s trap several years ago in Karachi.

WO: What is Dr. Asfi smiling at when he looks at Zubia during her first meeting at home with 

Faryal?

Farhat Ishtiaq: Although both of them had warm feelings towards each other by the time Faryal came back to visit, they had not said anything. Hence, when Zubia cannot help feeling jealous and her feelings are written all over her face, Asfandayar feels happy. Zubia’s behavior confirmed that the feelings of love are not one-sided.

WO: Will you ever consider writing a sequel to Yakeen Ka Safar?

Farhat Ishtiaq: A lot of people are asking me that question (haha)! I won’t say never as you never know what might inspire me to write it someday but as of now there are no plans. Something else MIGHT be cooking though but I cannot say anything just yet.